In classical Hindu mythology the sun, with its heat and power represents masculinity, and the feminine is represented by the cool, calm and gentle moon. That beautiful contrast is acknowledged across time and culture, over and over again, and while different cultures have different symbols for the genders, in an encouraging number of cases, the feminine is celebrated as both a powerful and honor-worthy thing.
Hindus worship Shakti as the great mother goddess, and dignity, grace and intelligence are her defining characteristics. I particularly like about her that she is called the great mother goddess specifically, and not the great woman goddess or the great princess goddess or any other typical western expression of femininity. She is a nurturer, a teacher, a shaper of worlds and a creator of beauty.
This has been on my mind as a theme lately for two reasons: one is another book I picked up again after several years, and the other is my own watching myself be myself in the lives of the people around me. There are some encounters after which I feel drained, fragile, defeated, and other encounters that leave me feeling whole, calm, happy, even beautiful, and the contrast between them has become easier and easier to see. In the same way yoga teaches us body awareness, so that we engage our bellies when we fold over instead of caving our chests and rounding our shoulders; we stop eating when we are satisfied, we relax what's tense when we are still, we know what we have to relax and what to engage to move smoothly through our ranges of motion... yoga also teaches awareness of our states of mind, so that we can stop doing what changes our mental state for the worse, and do more of what releases our stress and lifts us up.
So, what I've noticed and, having noticed once now notice more and more, is that the interactions in which I've been at all harsh or demanding are the interactions I leave feeling more fragile for having experienced. Even when logic would say I should have felt tough, I still walk away feeling fractured. On the other hand, when I've been nurturing, encouraging, reassuring, and have felt (I'll just go on ahead and say it) pretty and put together, I walk away feeling calm and whole. Even when I have been pouring out of my cup and logic would say I should be feeling drained, I feel even more full.
I see the same phenomenon in my husband: when he is able to be in the mountains, kayak through intense white water, teach his son the skills and adventures of masculinity, he comes alive to a degree I rarely see when we are living our domesticated and calm lives at home. And, as a woman, I feel and enjoy my femininity all the more for his enjoying and displaying the best and strongest of his masculinity.
The book I talked about having picked up again after having read it several years ago is called "Captivating" by John & Stacie Eldridge. The book to which it is a compliment is called "Wild at Heart" by John Eldgridge only, and is about the way a man's instinct for the wildness of adventure, competition and heroism are the languages in which he was created to worship, and doing them is when he is being his most complete self. "Captivating" follows the same logic in exploring the idea that when a woman is doing the ancient, celebrated parts of being female, like creating life, health and beauty, she is speaking the language her creator gave her as her act of worship. They write from a Biblical take on the world, but explore in a really timeless and universal way the same idea of balance of opposites, and seeing the best of one by contrast with the other that humanity has been celebrating since her earliest myths.
Yoga's literal translation is "balance", and at this Vernal Equinox, when the sun and the moon are balancing each other with perfect symmetry, and our bodies balance the opposites of inhale and exhale, tension and release, right and left, up and down, front and back, I plan to continue forging the path deeper into the feminine, peaceful expressions that prove themselves over and over to be the ones my body and mind wear best. Enjoy the opening days of Spring!!
